When a man does not love himself, is he capable of loving his better half? This was the question a pastor recently posed and that is the reason for writing this article. Self-sabotage or self-destructive behaviours are those activities that are inimical to our wellbeing and yet, inexplicably, we keep doing them. And everywhere you look you see them: the most obvious being smoking, drinking and indulgence in the use psychotropic substances. Nevertheless, these self-harming behaviours are a legion. And not being aware of their existence tends to result in some of dreaded social meltdowns being experienced everywhere today. We need to understand that to have a healthy society we must first have people who are self aware and who practice selfcare.

*It pays to immerse in nature sometimes*

Self-care is an important aspect of personal well-being, requiring you to play an active role to improve your mood and energy levels. It involves understanding your personality, actions, values, beliefs, emotions, and thoughts. Neglecting self-care can lead to feelings of guilt or inadequacy.

In this article, I will set out some key self-care tips that will help you, not only maintain positive mental well being but also overcome Self-Sabotaging behaviours.

Importance of Self Awareness in Self-care

The following are some reasons why we need self awareness if we are to take better control of our emotional well being and indulge in best of mindfulness practices.

1. Self-awareness is important for self-care because it helps you to identify your needs, emotions, strengths, and weaknesses.

2. By being aware of yourself, you can make better choices for your well-being and happiness.

3. Your wellbeing robs off on people around you. When you are full of grumbling and grumpiness, you become poisonous to your environment. ‘Garbage in’, they say, ‘garbage out.’

Different Ways People Sabotage or Self-Destruct

*You have a responsibility to yourself and society to be healthy*

People sabotage their own self-interest or self-awareness when they act in ways that go against what should be their best interests, values, goals, or well-being. Why would someone self-sabotage? It may be due to fear, insecurity, doubt, or lack of confidence. Below are some common examples of self-sabotaging behaviours:

– Procrastinating on important tasks or projects

– Avoiding or giving up on challenges or opportunities

– Engaging in unhealthy habits or behaviors like gluttony, smoking and drinking excess alcohol or sodas

– Being overly self-critical or negative (Catastrophizing)

– Blaming others or external factors for your failures or problems

– Rejecting or sabotaging positive relationships or experiences

– Setting unrealistic or unattainable standards or expectations

Consequences of Self-sabotaging

Self-sabotage can have negative consequences for people’s mental and physical health, such as stress, anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, poor performance, and reduced satisfaction.

It can also prevent people from achieving their full potential and living a fulfilling life.

It can lead to a feeling not being wanted or loved by anyone.

How To Overcome Self-Sabotaging Behaviours

To overcome self-sabotage, you need to identify the root causes of your behavior and critically examine the underlying beliefs or emotions that drive them. You may also need to develop healthy coping skills and strategies to deal with stress, uncertainty, and fear.

Below are a few helpful steps to stop self-sabotage:

– Recognize the signs and patterns of self-sabotage

– Acknowledge and accept responsibility for your actions

– Explore and understand the reasons behind your behavior

– Replace negative thoughts with positive affirmations

– Set realistic and achievable goals and track your progress

– Seek support from friends, family, or professionals

– Celebrate your successes and learn from your mistakes

Self-sabotage is not a permanent or fixed trait. It is a learned behavior that can be unlearned . This involves changing the consciousness and your awareness through structured efforts and practice.

By overcoming self-sabotage, you can improve your self-awareness and self-interest, and create a more positive and rewarding life for yourself and people around you. 😊

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